Tuesday, October 23, 2012

82* (wee hours of the morning)-DECEMBER 22nd

I have been awake since just before 3am--it is beginning to be a pattern that it is driving me crazy. I wake up between 2 and 3 am every morning since Kenny's birthday. Maybe he wants me to make his birthday cake-- ha ha, it's a thought that just popped into my head. I will try to do that today. Although to me, it seems too late. Maybe that saying "better late than never" applies to the birthday cake. Lemon cake is rather delicious-> I was honestly shocked that Kenny liked it so much. 

A few years ago, I made a lemon cake- following a recipe that my great aunt had passed onto my grandmother, and my grandmother passed onto to me.This time it was for mi Mama's 60th birthday; however, I remember the first time my Grandma Estanislada and I made it together. My boys were very young- it was the only time my grandma came to visit Fresno after she moved back to her hometown in New Mexico. My Grandma Tanis(as I called her) was one of the sweetest people to ever live on this Earth! After she died on December 22, 1998 -> Kenny was the sweetest person left on Earth that I knew. He was only seven years old then. 

I always tell the story of when my Grandma Tanis died. I was the last family member to see Grandma alive; I went to visit her during her last days on Earth, in New Mexico. I flew there alone-and went to be with her in the hospital. I knew she wanted to see me because we were extremely close. She took me in when I graduated from high school. I went to my graduation festivities-} left for Monterey the next day with my bff, Melissa and another friend-} stayed there for a week-} then returned to my parents-} and moved into my grandma's house the very same day I got back from Monterey. My grandmother was a saint--she should be canonized in the Catholic church. There was no other person as kind, faithful, or loyal as my Grandma Tanis.

Anyway, my grandmother (such a lovely person) grew up in the very small town of Belen, New Mexico- the place where my father and I were born. In fact, the same doctor delivered both me and my father. Sorry,,I keep losing track with details. As I was saying about Belen--it is a place where it snows every winter. Beautiful, sparkly snow that lasts for a few minutes to a few days at a time; but not the kind of snow that interrupts daily routines for the most part.

As a young woman, Grandma Tanis moved to California; where she got married, and eventually moved to the San Joaquin Valley. Grandma used to always say she missed the snow. Every winter she would say "it doesn't snow in Fresno, I wish it snowed in Fresno." On December 22, 1998 it snowed in Fresno. That is the day my wonderful grandmother died. I left the hospital, it was horribly difficult to let go of my grandma's hand. I can still feel our fingers lingering on those last few seconds as I walked away. I took a cab to the airport. Within a half hour Grandma Tanis passed away. I think I was boarding the plane. There was a small flurry of snowflakes as the plane lifted for take off. However, IT SNOWED IN FRESNO THAT DAY!!! The day my grandma died Fresno got the most snow I have known of in 45 years of life. The ground was covered with beautiful, sparkly snow. My three sons were in this very house and they went outside to play in the snow. My ex-husband took pictures of the house and my car covered in snow. He also took pictures of the boys in the backyard with snow falling around them. It was the kindest thing Michael ever did for me. I always say it snowed that day because of my Grandma Tanis's spirit. I say she used her special spirit magic to make it snow in Fresno on the day she died because that was always one of her lifetime wishes.

Well, there's nothing more I can say to top that story so I will sign off again for now.
Until later today...I wonder what the day will bring...

Love and "PEACE" to all~~ especially all those loved ones who have passed before me:

Noemi Robles Grigsby--my mother-} Oct. 1968

Bernarda Lerma--my kindest caretaker and grandmother-}May 1988

Estanislada Romelia Sanchez Grigsby-} my lovely, loving grandmother-} December 1998

Kenny Salvatore Cipolla-} my beautiful, kindest, loving, goofiest, darling son-} November 2011

I MISS ALL OF YOU SO MUCH WITH ALL MY HEART <3   

 
       

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