I just spent an hour trying to figure out how to convert a PDF file to be compatible to this blog, but it was to no avail!
I am completely frustrated. Obviously, there is still more for me to learn. I was unable to download it from my e-mail into any readable file.
So, that will have to be for another entry.
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On a personal note~
I spent most of today creating and packaging Jheremy's birthday present.
I must say I did very well with that. I painted him a card with water colors. Then decorated the card and inscribed one of my favorite quotes:
" If you are lucky enough to find a way
of life you love, you have to find the
courage to live it."
~ John Irving
I also wrote him the story of the day he was born.
And,, I made him an incredibly aromatic lavender spray. It's a soothing scent which is one of my favorites.
I was hoping to write a full blog entry. But, that also is not going to happen because I have to get ready for work at 6am.
I continue to strive on my spiritual journey, although the stresses of life try to dissuade me I fight to not allow them.
I am venturing out into this new area I am living in. Exploring stretches of beach and rock I never knew existed. There is solace and healing in the crashes of the ocean waves, which nearly make up for all the hardships of life.
I also continue in my pursuit to find a connection with Kenny. His presence isn't as prominent as it once was; however there are still little signs that he is watching over me even though there is a complete lack of communication.
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Signs from Kenny
The last couple weeks have been particularly difficult and stressful. I cry for Kenny as much as ever. The loss has not diminished with the passage of time.
Lately, the greatest signs I think I get from him are related to the numbers 11 and 29.
Here is an example from yesterday.
I was having lunch with a friend after going on a fairly easy trail leading to the cliffs of the ocean's edge at Harmony State Park. We moved three times before settling at a table. I looked over and this scripture was written on the back of a shirt of a girl who was sitting across from us.
Jeremiah 29:11
Truly fitting because I had been thinking of my plans for Jheremy's birthday and also about writing Kenny's blog nearly the entire day,, and I had been silently asking Kenny to send me some kind of inspiration.
There are two things special about seeing this scripture.
One: Jheremy's name was inspired by Jeremiah the prophet. However, I did not want to give him the name Jeremiah; therefore, I incorporated the 'h' into his name. This is how I came up with the unusual spelling of his name.
Two: 29-11. This should be a little more obvious for anyone who knows the date of Kenny's last living day on Earth. 11-29
Also, the scripture is a perfect message in response to how I have been feeling lately. Wondering.... when will life truly improve? Am I really being watched over because the stress was making me feel very abandoned. And there, on the back of a shirt worn by a stranger was my answer.
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Another sign from Kenny
As I struggle to put my life back together and find freedom from my current situation I got a second job.
I am going to be a summer camp counselor. Actually, I am looking forward to this job very much. Anyway, after I left my friend, I went to the San Luis Parks and Recreation building to pick up my new employee information packet. I had to put money in a meter as there is no free parking in the area. I was unsure how long I would be so I put in enough for 30 minutes.
I was in and out very quickly. So quickly, in fact, that this is what the meter read when I returned to my car.
Until next time,
Blessings of Love and Peace
